Testimony

The first memory of my life faded in when I was about 3 years old. I “woke up” in the top of the Oak tree in the back yard…way up high in the trees. My two guardian angels were with me in the midst of explaining they were going to have to go now that I'm older. Though I couldn’t remember a lot of detail as they were fading from my memory fast…I knew this was true…not “play- like” with an imaginary friend. They let me know they'd still be there but not in this realm where I could see them.

Suddenly I slipped and fell. Me! I remember thinking how weird this was. Falling from the top of the tree I remember thinking....how did this happen to ME!? My parent called me a "monkey" because I have always been so sure footed and agile. But then out of nowhere my hand was grabbed and placed firmly on a branch so that I could stop the fall! I felt it...it happened...thank you Guardian Angels and God who sent them.

You know the drill- blank spots here and there. But two things that were always consistent were: I knew I was special and would do great things....and that God was there everywhere I went. I saw Him in the wind, the trees, birds, and people. I felt Him watching me, loving me, teaching me, laughing with me and crying with me. I felt His disappointment in me, but at the same time always opening and closing doors to get me back on the right track.

Cocky little child wasn’t I? In my young little naive mind the feeling that I had “the call” to be special was immediately interpreted in the world’s viewpoint of special. You know… famous for one thing or another. This misinterpretation followed me well through life. But this feeling of being someone special is true just not in the form I had first thought of.

All the children God has called and saved through their receiving His gift of sending Jesus to die and bridge the gap to Him are special. The children that hear Jesus’ knocking at the door of our heart and soul and simply ask Him in…they are special too. Jesus had come to my door and I finally asked Him in when I was in the sixth grade.

Through faith. Because at this point though God was sooo very real to me, Jesus was like a cartoon picture in my head. But through faith I asked Him into my heart to be my Lord and Savior, and my best friend.

It really irritated me that I only had this “cartoon vision” of him in my mind. I so wanted to see Him. And one day I did years later. Was it when I had become the beautiful, loving, pure Godly woman that I so desired to be? Naw! Get this…Jesus became real to me at a time in my life when I became the person I soooo hated that I couldn’t even stand to look at myself in the mirror.

Like Peter who was horrified at the thought that he would actually deny Jesus three times, I was horrified at the things I had done that had always been disgusted by when I saw others doing them.
But this is why He had to come to save me…and this is the thing that finally “clicked” and I saw Jesus as real being…when I saw He loved me so much just like I was. I was at a point I hated myself, but He showed me His love for me…so undeserved. Things have never been the same since!


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